Almost Educated

Ask a question. Get an Almost Intelligent Answer.    A small collection of excellent


The friend zone is very real. We have all had someone we were close to that we realized we were crushing on in a big way - but we hated ourselves for it. As much as we hoped and prayed things would change for the better, many of us acknowledged that our love for the other person was going to be detrimental towards the relationship. The people in this kind of friend zone cry while watching romance movies or go out and get drunk and kiss strangers. We make sure to keep a respectful distance between the person we like and ourselves - we are distinctly afraid of fucking things up because of our shitty heart being a complete dickweed and doing the thumpy thing when it shouldn’t.

The Friend Zone is entirely false and is a complete invention made by boys who on one hand get angry if they think you’re soliciting sex by playing video games but on the other hand get angry if you are not soliciting sex just by breathing. The Friend Zone consists rarely of actual friends - instead it’s often people who stare at us in class and make us uncomfortable by constantly trying to talk to us while we’re obviously engaged in something else. These are the people who invade our personal space and aren’t afraid to talk dismissively about the things which we are passionate about - our faith in particular.

These are not kind people. Once I was in a hospital’s waiting room and a woman was quietly saying a prayer for her son. After a few minutes, several other people joined in, linking their hands and bowing their heads. The boy next to me began to talk loudly to me about how disgusting and juvenile it was and how amused he happened to be by the behavior of the “sheep.”

"I’m Catholic," I replied, looking into his eyes, "I think what they’re doing is beautiful."

He looked down my shirt. “You seemed more intelligent than that,” he snorted, “I should have known. Are you even reading that book or are you just skimming?”

I blinked. I wish I had said something like, “No, I’m just breathing in the words and hoping they stick,” but instead I just gave him a dirty look and tried to tune him out. He kept talking to me for the better part of an hour.

Eventually, he got around to asking me out for coffee. I wanted to explain I was waiting for my mother to get out of chemotherapy, that my family was poised on the edge of a terrible end, that I barely knew him and basically already hated him. Instead, I smiled sheepishly and said, “I’d rather not.”

"You bitch," he replied. I watched his face flare hot. "You sluts are all like this. You play hard-to-get faux-intelligent and you lead people on just to hurt them."

"I’m…?" I started. I was scared. He was in my face. His hands were curled into fists.

"You’re all like this," he repeated. At this point, a few of the other people in the room were staring. I was pressed against the side of my chair, trying to get as far from him as I could. He wouldn’t lower his voice. "You fucking friend zone all the nice guys and date shitty asshole men and then come crying to our shoulders when you need someone."

I am not a confrontational person. Panic bubbled in my throat. I felt tears jump into my eyes. I started stuttering again. I was really honestly positive he was going to hurt me - for no other reason than turning down coffee.

This is the difference between the friend zone and the Friend Zone: one is hating yourself for liking the other person. The other is hating the other person for not liking you.

A nighttime story about why the terrible deep Friend Zone, mostly written because about seventeen boys have asked what I mean when I complain about it. (via inkskinned)

(via harperhug)

— 12 hours ago with 29850 notes
somaticimpaler-deactivated20140 asked: Would you like to watch me stroke my dick?






imageIs this how you approach EVERY FEMALE YOU MEET? There is something really disgusting and predatory about a guy who sexually harasses every woman he encounters.

Also I see you’ve got your facebook right there on your blog as well as pics of yourself and are even in a band called from empires to ashes. Do your band mates know you’re an internet predator? Do your fans know what kind of guy you are, Charles Catapano???


Some more girls have come forward saying they were also harassed in a similar fashion on League of legends by Charlie.

He also uses the name SomaticImpaler on league of legends and when he sees a player he suspects to be female, will IMMEDIATELY add them and make his usual “WANT TO SEE MY DICK” PROPOSITION WITHOUT EVEN ASKING FOR AN AGE. I see that league of legends is an ALL AGES GAME so he has most likely harassed minors as well.

He will also try to get the skype account of female players, and those who were friendly and trusting enough to add him have confirmed to me has the name “Charlie Catapano” as the display name as well as a photo of him and of course, tried to show them his penis.


— 12 hours ago with 2805 notes

you ever want to cry and laugh at the same time 


you ever want to cry and laugh at the same time 

(via uhohsupergay)

— 12 hours ago with 232936 notes


When kids point out things you’re really self conscious about


(via uhohsupergay)

— 12 hours ago with 196252 notes







This is Ke$ha’s song ‘Blow’ without auto tune.

this is actually eerie. I like it far more than the actual song.

anyone know who did this mix? I would like a copy of it :) 

EDIT found it!

this still makes me picture ke$ha breaking into abandoned clubs in a postapocalyptic wasteland and blowing them up on the way out because what the fuck else are you going to do

I love it a whole lot wow yes


(via uhohsupergay)

— 12 hours ago with 442808 notes





im literally cryinggg

an icon

(Source: , via uhohsupergay)

— 12 hours ago with 103822 notes




So I was looking at this terrible lingerie shop and….

bringing this back

she criticizes the taste of your meat for half an hour then storms off, it’s very erotic

(via onlylolgifs)

— 1 day ago with 35928 notes






“The character design of Flynn came from the process which was called the “hot man meeting” by Nathan Greno and Byron Howard, during which they set up a meeting with all of the female employees of the studio in one room and asked them for their opinions of what made a man good looking in order to create Flynn’s character design with features such as eye color, hair color and style and body type. Video footage showed concept art and photos of various male celebrities, including Johnny Depp, Hugh Jackman, Brad Pitt, David Beckham and Gene Kelly on the walls of the room. Director Byron Howard said they wanted to make Flynn “the most handsome, most attractive male lead Disney has ever had.”


"The hot man meeting" is now my second favorite animation design story, after the one about how Pixar animators working on the Dug team for Up had “fat dog day” where they basically went to a shelter and were like “please bring out your fattest dogs,” and then they hung out with the fattest jolliest available dogs, all day. 


man would i love to be a pixar animator

Don’t forget Brave’s Kilt Fridays where all the animators wore kilts to work every friday during production.

This is why I want to work for these fun guys

(via harperhug)

— 1 day ago with 275290 notes






Jacob’s Well - Wimberley, Texas

hey kids let’s all go jump into the pits of hell

This is the scariest thing I’ve ever seen.

People have actually died in Jacob’s Well, but not just from jumping, you’re too buoyant to really go down far.

But Jacob’s Well draws a lot of scuba divers, and some of them have gotten lost and run out of air. Some of the bodies have never even been found, because the underground river that feeds Jacob’s Well is so complex. I find that terrifying.

I’ve been there. You have to be careful because coming back up from too far and you get stuck under rocks trying to find the surface.

Wow look at that giant hole of NOPE.

(via harperhug)

— 1 day ago with 407677 notes

toothless in 99i got a ton of toothless requests; so i made this one move
commissions are open


toothless in 99
i got a ton of toothless requests; so i made this one move

commissions are open

(via saiikavon)

— 2 days ago with 12299 notes





my seventeenth birthday is in a few weeks…and I’m actually kind of sad…i really like being sixteen

but if your sixteen you cant be the dancing queen

thank u little bread stick that made me feel better 


this is the best thing to happen to one of my text posts

(via theawkwardwhovian)

— 2 days ago with 109240 notes



Do you slip it on him tail first?

nah i just hold it open and he crawls in

(via theawkwardwhovian)

— 2 days ago with 57608 notes